Born October 11, 1955, I grew up in a lush, hilly neighborhood in Berkeley near the Oakland border. The youngest of five children, and being seven years younger that my closest sibling, a late (but not unplanned) addition to the family, I was privileged to live the comfortable life of a child with older, well established parents. From the 5 th grade on, when the last of my siblings went off to college, I was an only child, but with the advantage of having a brother and three sisters.

Music has been a big part of my life from the beginning and was a major influence in the family. My mother was a cellist, often inviting her friends over to play quartets, my father a devoted listener to recordings of music by J. S. Bach, and both were dedicated members of the church choir. Each of the kids studied piano and my siblings all played in the school orchestra or band on such instruments as the flute, violin, and clarinet. My brother also played the guitar. One of my earliest memories is performing with the “cherub” choir in church at the age of three.

I continued singing in church and school choirs throughout my youth, and in fact decided, after taking viola lessons in the 9 th grade that I wanted to take voice lessons starting in the 10 th grade because that was where my heart was. I was fortunate to be exposed to quality music-making throughout my childhood both at church, and especially in the Berkeley schools. In the mid-1960’s I sang alto, alongside my mother, in a performance of Bernstein’s Chichester Psalms, then a newly composed hit, at St. John’s Presbyterian Church. Berkeley High had a very strong music program–this was pre-Proposition 13, remember–and during my sophomore and junior years I sang in very credible performances of Beethoven’s Ninth Symphony, and believe it or not, Britten’s War Requiem.

Besides the music programs at school and church I always had art projects going on at home. From abstract painting and pastels when I was younger, I moved on to jewelry, then macramé and finally sewing in high school. Sewing has been a passion that has stuck with me since then. I’ve made countless shirts, each a unique design, for myself and loved ones, in addition to gifts and commissions of women’s garments for family and friends as well as quilts, hats and bags, etc. I even went to fashion design school for two years, thinking that I might be able to support myself in fashion in order to be a musician. (Wrong!)

At the age of sixteen I had a vision. One day, while crossing the campus after school let out, I was visited by a band of angels. They told me that my purpose in life was to be a musician, and I decided right then that this would be the path I would follow. Upon graduating from Berkeley High, in 1973, I went on the California State University at Hayward as a voice major. After two years I dropped out to “find myself” and to get some real world experience as an adult. During that year I began composing in earnest, something I had dabbled in during high school. I returned to Cal-State as a composition major, but again dropped out after a year. At this point, now 21, I had already been a member of the San Francisco Symphony Chorus for three years, was beginning to come out as a gay man, and didn’t feel I was getting anything out of school that would further my budding career as a musician. Although I wasn’t yet getting paid, I was performing with a professional ensemble, the SF Symphony, and had begun working as a church musician. In the spring of 1977 I moved into a studio apartment in San Francisco and began the life of a starving musician in the big city, working days in retail to pay the rent.

The following year, a fellow tenor from the Symphony Chorus, who also sang alto in the Grace Cathedral Choir of Men and Boys, asked me if I wanted to join him and a few other friends for an evening of reading through choral music for men’s voices. That evening lead to the first concert, a few months later in the old Mission Dolores, of Chanticleer. Of course this group has gone on to world renown since then. I sang with them for the first four years, which included the group’s first European tour during which we won second prize in a prestigious international competition, the first two recordings (Chanticleer on Tour, now out of print, and Psallite!) and the first US tour, a total of 17 weeks traveling around the county, 10 of us in a single van, driving 100-300 miles every day. At the conclusion of that tour, I felt I had “done” it–the tours, the recordings, etc.–and had discovered that the life of a touring musician is not all that glamorous. Not having the chance to do any composing also began to weigh on me heavily. So I dropped out of Chanticleer, and entered the San Francisco Conservatory of Music in the fall of 1982 as a composition major.

I returned to my positions in the Symphony Chorus and the Grace Cathedral Choir of Men and Boys, basically picking up my life in San Francisco where I had left off. I graduated in 1985 with a Bachelor of Music degree, but decided not to take my education any further because I was already doing what I enjoyed, and had no desire to teach in an academic setting, for which I would need advanced degrees. In 1987, the Symphony decided to add an Assistant Conductor position for the Chorus and held auditions. Although I had not done a lot of conducting, other than a small volunteer church choir for a couple of years, I held my own and was awarded the job. In fact standing in front of 200 singers and conducting them was a real “aha” moment for me. There was a sense of “I can do this, and do it well” feeling that resulted from that 10 minute audition.

So my life continued in the same vein, working retail by day, singing and conducting in choirs at night and on Sundays at church. In November of 1992 I was sitting in the choir stalls at Grace Cathedral one Sunday morning, not listening to the sermon, when I realized that after 12 years, I had had enough of the high church “smells and bells” experience and decided I should look for a new job, this time as the director of a church choir, not just a chorister. As fate would have it, the very next day the phone rang at 8:00 in the morning–not a time that anyone who knows me would dream of calling. The caller was Rick Fabian, one of the rectors at St. Gregory of Nyssa Episcopal Church, then meeting in a rented chapel in San Francisco ’s Pacific Heights. He had been given my name as someone connected to the Bay Area music scene capable of recommending qualified persons for the position of Music Director at the church.But this was a unique situation. The church was involved in exploring new ways of doing liturgy, creating a welcoming environment that encouraged participation by all congregants in every aspect of the service.

Actually the word “new” is a misnomer in this context. Through his extensive research and understanding of the early Christian church, including the Orthodox as well as western practices along with a keen knowledge of Asian and other religious forms, Rick’s idea was return to the liturgy aspects of these early services that would foster the concepts of welcome and participation. As he explained to me during that fateful phone call, the service is sung throughout by the entire congregation in harmony, a cappella. And during the service the congregation moves around the space via simple line dances that are taught in the moment. There is an a cappella choir as well, that supports the congregational singing.

He suggested that the person they were looking for needed to be a strong singer, as he or she would be leading the service as “cantor.” And s/he didn’t need keyboard skills, as there was no organ (or piano), and that since they were creating a new liturgical form, being able to compose new music tailored to their needs would be helpful. Talk about bells going off in my head! I told Rick that I had one person to suggest for the position; myself. After an audition, in which I worked with the four members of the choir and actually introduced one of my (very difficult!) choral anthems, I was awarded the job. I began the second Sunday of 1993 and have been having a lot of fun at St. Gregory’s ever since. Lots of photos and extensive written material about the church and its origin, liturgy and mission can be found at:

                                              

Over the years since my graduation from the Conservatory in 1985, I periodically asked myself if I should pursue getting an advanced degree in music. For many years the answer remained the same; I’m doing what I want to be doing professionally, and there is no reason to continue studies. But in the mid-nineties I began to yearn for a job as conductor of a large chorus with the attendant opportunities for creative programming and conducting. I did apply for several jobs with Bay Area choruses as they came open but never made it past the first cut, simply because I didn’t meet the requirement of having a Master’s degree (or higher). Finally, one day in 1998 as I was driving near Golden Gate Park, a voice if my head said, “Now is the time,” and I found myself not going where I had planned, but instead turning toward the Conservatory to pick up an application.

The SF Conservatory only offers a degree in orchestral conducting, but strategically this was fine with me, as my goal was to one day conduct the large choral/orchestral masterpieces that I had grown to love over my years with the Symphony. I would need a good technique and a feeling of comfort when in front of an orchestra, so this intensive experience working with instrumentalists would be a valuable opportunity. I took a few lessons with Denis DeCoteau, the late and beloved conductor of the SF Ballet Orchestra, to prepare for the auditions conducting the Conservatory Orchestra. And from about 10 auditionees, I was one of two candidates accepted for the two-year Master’s degree program.

Initially, my primary conducting teacher was Jung Ho Pak, who had been a classmate of mine at SFCM in the Eighties, and now conductor of the San Diego Symphony. He was also conductor of the Conservatory Orchestra, planning to commute between the two jobs. But the schedule never worked well for him, and my fellow conducting student and I felt adrift. As a result, the conservatory staff arranged with David Milnes, conductor of the UC Berkeley Orchestra, and faculty conducting professor to work with the two of us as well. This turned out to be a godsend, as David was an excellent teacher who, having worked with Otto Meuller at Yale, had an exquisite grounding in conducting technique as well as a wonderful model for teaching the craft. Working with David Milnes, as well as the courses I took while in the Master’s program was an experience I am most grateful for, and will always remember fondly.

Something about my internal clock seems to be well calibrated because less than a week after I graduated from the Conservatory with my degree in hand, I ran into an old friend who was consulting with the Baroque Choral Guild, a local community choir. She mentioned that they were in a search for a new music director. The thought crossed my mind that this might be a good opportunity, but before I could act on the thought, I was contacted by the organization with word that I was on their “short list” and was I interested in applying. Within a month I found myself conducting the choir at an audition and began as Music Director that Fall, in 2000. In 2004 my title was upgraded to Artistic Director and I’ve enjoyed watching the group grow; both musically, happily mastering the difficult music I throw at them, as well as organizationally, including adopting a new name, Cantabile Chorale. In the summer of 2008 the group went through another organizational shift. We have gone back to our old "BCG" moniker under the new name of Bay Choral Guild.

Working with an independent community non-profit certainly has its challenges, but the rewards are bountiful as well. We’ve had a great time producing a variety of concerts as well as expanding our reach as the “house chorus” for the California Symphony in Walnut Creek, as well as with the MidSummer Mozart Festival.